Beth's Ponderings “Trying to prove something to someone is never a valid reason for doing anything.” - Iyanla Vanzant Whether you make formal New Year’s Resolutions or not, all of us spend at least one fleeting moment at the beginning of each new year imagining how we’d like this year to be different than the previous one. The difference we wish for could be simply to have some good moments continue, or it could swing to the other extreme as we wish for a complete overhaul as the previous year was one heartache after another. Whatever your wish may be, WHY do you wish for this change? Many times in our lives someone else will say or do something to us and we’ll respond by saying, “I’ll show them!” (This phrase is often followed by “and then they’ll be sorry!”) While proving we are not what the other person said we were, or that we would never treat anyone they way we’ve been treated, may occasionally provide a kick in the pants to jumpstart a personal change, as a long-term motivation technique it doesn't work. This is because we are investing our personal energy in the “other person” and not in ourselves. If you only want to change to “teach another person a lesson,” you are doing yourself a huge disservice. You will probably end up investing valuable money, time, and energy into something that you have no passion or desire for, and if you have a stubborn personality, how many years will it take for you to admit you headed down the wrong path? Because at the end of the day, the “other person” won’t notice or care as they have their own stresses and worries and people to prove things to. On the other hand, if you wish to change to enhance your own life, regardless of the opinions of others, you will find that the change will be easier to accomplish and maintain, even if it is physically, mentally, or emotionally challenging. Opportunities surround us each and every day. But not all those opportunities are right for us. We need to figure out who we will really be investing our energy in and why. True investments in ourselves and our futures are never wasted. May 2015 be an incredible year for you all!