August 7, 2015 Chautauqua

Beth's Ponderings

   No matter what area of our lives we are dealing with, we all have an idea of what we want the ‘ideal’ to be, our ultimate wish list of the perfect outcome, be it a dream job, the place we want to live, something we want to achieve, or a particular relationship.

   Generally, it is good to have goals and dreams, and achieving these dreams and goals helps us develop into the person we are destined to become.

   However, sometimes we discover that what we thought we wanted is not really what we want.There is an old saying, “Be careful what you wish for, as you may get it.”We find out that the dream job is not such a dream, the place we want to live is not a nurturing environment, the achievement is not enriching our lives, or the relationship is going nowhere.

   One reason for this is because we confuse the external wants for the internal wants.  The externals - job, new location, achievement, relationship, etc. - are merely different paths to our internal wants.  Once we realize the difference, and acknowledge the internal wants, then we can see more options available to us and can stop fixating on one narrow path.

   There are many paths our lives can take.  We are not being forced to choose just one.  Nor does it mean that if we miss one path we should just give up as our lives are over. 

   While it is important to identify our internal wants, that isn’t the whole story either. 

   What we want isn’t always what we need.  And life has a unique habit of giving what we need more often than we get what we want.
   Our wants are many, but few of us ever really take the time to think about what we need in particular life situations to help us grow and move forward.

   Wanting something is not bad, but sometimes we are required to release the desire for what we want so we can welcome into our lives what we need, which ultimately will lead to greater happiness in the long run.

Beth

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