I once had a friend express that she was glad to know I got angry after I’d totally erupted in a public venue. I, on the other hand, was surprised that she would even consider that I DIDN’T get angry, because I most certainly do, and I definitely express it, though not always publicly, yet just often enough to get me into trouble.
As well, I found some of the reactions to my recent makeover to be in that same category. One person actually said they were surprised to see me wearing a dress?!?! Now, THAT should NOT have been a surprise to anyone who knows me in the slightest!
So, why these reactions? It seems to be a case of people only seeing me, or interacting with me, in a particular setting or circumstance. Or, else they just aren’t paying attention.
Just because you, in particular, have never seen me angry, doesn’t automatically mean I don’t get angry. Just because you, in particular, haven’t seen me wearing a specific item of clothing, doesn’t automatically mean that I don’t. And, more important, just because you, in particular, have seen me act or dress in a certain way, doesn’t automatically mean I ONLY act or dress that way.
While we humans are multi-faceted, our interactions with the people around aren’t always. We tend to make assumptions about what we think we know about others, and then it is so easy, and very tempting, to look at them as equivalent to cardboard cut-outs - in a static state, never changing. We often do this with people we have limited contact with, but we can even do this with close family members.
But, life doesn’t work that way. We have many sides and aspects to our personalities that may, or may not, be expressed depending on the situations we find ourselves in. As well, we are always changing - even if we don’t think we are - and we bring those cumulating changes into each and every interaction we have with the people around us.
As much as we think we know the various people in our lives, we may not know them as well as we think we do.
Read the complete issue of The Chautauqua here: https://sites.google.com/site/thechautauqua22/home/August%2018%2C%202017%20Chautauqua.pdf?attredirects=0&d=1